Nothing is more boring than our own opinions. My characters have far more of value to say

 

Writing has taught me something that I might otherwise have failed to learn. It perhaps makes me who I am, still flawed in the usual ways but having worked out some of what matters to me.

The core challenge of writing is farming knowledge from people around me to develop stories and characters. If we only ever wrote from a single point of view, that is, our own, then all writing would be one dimensional, predictable and boring. Like some other writers, when I began, I wrote in order to express an opinion or tell the world what I think. Quickly I learnt that politically motivated rants offer little nuance without a character to support. Writing therefore is not about imposing my opinion on other people but listening and understanding other points of view. Giving life to them. Their opinions might actually be more important than mine. This is extraordinarily powerful when exploring the experience of women and other minority groups. The downtrodden or victims of abuse.

That is a lesson in life. Ask myself, why do people think or do what they do? The conclusion is rarely vastly different from our own motivations. So learning about ourselves helps us to understand others.

As an exercise this starts with self-exploration, gathering my own motivations, darker desires, framing my opinions and getting a sense of my own imperfections. This self-examination is by no means a perfect exercise. The results can be inconsistent and frequently affected by mood. Some people are self-critical, others struggle to admit failings so easily and will see history in rose tinted ways. It is hard to be honest with ourselves but the exercise remains useful. Others will attempt similar learning through spirituality and I have complete respect for the centuries old traditions of self-exploration through religion or meditation as long as it is not some kind of self-harm or sacrificial ritual. That kind of activity is the opposite of learning. The creation of pain or harm seems wholly unnecessary when so many other methods exist.

I am keen to understand spiritual rituals more. In my complete minimalist superficial exploration of these methods so far, they have been useful for clearing my mind, but have taught me little more about myself.

My self-learning has been through the creation of story characters. I started this piece by talking about listening and learning from others. This allows me to create the story characters and see life through their eyes. Using the first person in writing empowers those characters to be bolder and share with the reader elaborate versions of me. The reader can take a view that some of what is described is the writer’s personal point of view but clearly if my character is a woman or someone distinctly different e.g. age, ethnicity then the ability of the reader to attach meaning to the writer is challenged. For the writer in me, it allows me to braver with content. Things I don’t feel able to talk about or say myself are given voice and power. Without this self-expression I couldn’t be as brave. I guess actors would say something similar. By becoming a character they can give more of themselves.

In my characters, I know the bits that belong to me and those I stole from others. The extent to which I do that is unimportant to the reader as long as the story is worth it. But for me it is invaluable. It has given me the discipline to avoid judgement and understand more about why people are the way they are. As stated above it’s not a perfect process. I still slip into opinion and lazy judgement at times. I simply try to do it less.

The times I am more likely to slip into such lazy judgement is when faced with those who don’t have this self-examination. Those who deny others their experience and lack empathy. Those who tell rather than listen, impose rather than encourage, create difference rather than seek union.

Modern social exchanges lack much about what we learned from each other in the past. As convenience creates apathy and empathy collapses when we need it most.

Sharing has never taken anything away from me. I still have my preferences and choices, I still see myself as individual. The worry is that many still struggle with this and the more we challenge the harder the point of view becomes. I found my way but can’t see why others don’t do the same. Apathy and convenience might be the answer. The result is extremes grow stronger. As they encourage more hardening of views, we will all be less for it.